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Auckland and New Zealands Best and Funniest Singing telegram service
SINGING TELEGRAMS IN AUCKLAND
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Phone Direct 0274339481
ContactPlease Email and send your contact phone number ( for a faster responce ), thank you. Click email link
impactentertainment1991@yahoo.co.nz
Austin Powers
Basil Fawlty (Fawlty towers)
 
Pink Panther Clown Telegram
 
Stand up Comedy telegram
Rocky Horror telegram
Aloha Gorillagram
Auckland, HawkesBay and Hamilton Singing Telegrams and Comedy telegrams.
impactentertainment1991@yahoo.co.nz
Phone 0274339481
Please check out the show reels on my intro page and see some of the telegram characters
We offer a money back guarantee with all our comedy telegrams…no laughter no charge…you cant lose!
Singing telegrams and Comedy telegrams are great for Birthdays, Anniversary, Hens-party/Stag-party, Farewells, Saying I love you, Asking forgiveness, work promotions, Congratulations, Graduations, Marriage proposals, Wedding Day messages, or just to say Thank you:....If you can think of anything else; let us know!
With our expertise, professional performers and dedication to presenting the funniest yet heart felt telegrams; the occasion will always be a high light to be remembered by all
We send you a question sheet, you fill it out (with all the funny things you can think of) and we write a personalised telegram that will spark up memories and give the crowd a huge laugh never to be forgotten.
After any telegram the celebrated victim feels great as the entertainer reinforces how much they are loved and admired by all their friends and family attending.
That’s what makes our Singing telegrams and comedy telegrams the best!
Choose any of our Characters or suggest something yourself.
Stand up comedy telegram with Italian Romano Zucchini
Always a crowd pleaser, great interactive comedy routine and telegram.
National and international Comedian Romano comes along and presents a hilarious comedy routine, filled with innuendo and audience participation. The receiver of the telegram gets to choose who partakes in the antics (this makes them feel extra special).
Butt the Butler
They wont know what has hit them when Butt comes in the door. Butt can also be hired out for the night and will perform a side splitting show, audience games and one of our famous telegrams…ad some class with your very own (creepy) butler
Rocky Horror telegram
One of our most popular is Frankenfurter (from the Rocky Horror Show). Frank comes along with his big whip. The look on the “victims” face will be priceless!
He’s just a sweet transvestite. Hire him for your Mucho boyfriend…or uncle if you want to see fear on their faces.
For Hens parties Frank fits the spot, the girls will love playing the blow dart game; but WHAT WILL BE THE TARGET???
If they’re a Rocky Horror Fan; Franks your man…
How about the French Maid Marie-Louise or Italian Opera singer, Luciana Wannabonkalotta?
Austin Powers Groovy Baby Telegram
If you’re after that shagadelic experience call on the king of cool; Austin Powers.
He will leave the crowd screaming “Yeah baby Yeah”!
Hens Parties and Hens Nights
hens night entertainment auckland
Hens Party with Romano
We have a special Hens party show/telegram that gets the ladies going with adult games that will leave them in hysterics laughing. The girls love the very smooth Italian stallion (and he’s funny too!)
If you are having any type of party, this would have to be the one to leave a great memory for the victim and all those attending; every one likes to be entertained and laugh.
Where else can you get a comedy show performed by a comedian and telegram at the venue of your choice?
Hens nights With Butt the Butler
The most requested for Hens parties is Butt the Butler, who comes along and gets the party pumping. The master has sent him to keep everybody happy, relaxed and amused; with crazy comedy, hilarious props and Swedish massage.
Butt also performs an amazing comedy magic routine, cheeky adult games and reads out a great comedy telegram from info supplied from the victims friends..
This is great if the girls are wanting something funny, cheeky and well done. They will talk about it for ages
Rocky Horror Hensnite with Frankenfurter
For Hens parties Frank fits the spot, the girls will love playing the blow dart game; but WHAT WILL BE THE TARGET???
If they’re a Rocky Horror Fan; Franks your man…
The Aunties and Grandmas sure get a thrill with this one…they blush but never look away.
Stag parties
If he’s been a bad boy, he’s bound to need a good spanking by our very popular Donna Matrix, or have his doldrums dusted away by the French Maid. If you really want to scare him straight….send in Frankenfurter
If these don’t light ya flame, we’ve got others to play ya game!
All characters are available for any telegram
What about a G string cleaner, male or female….? It’s funny how all the friends come over when this happens!
All telegrams professionally performed, by seasoned perfromers in the best possible taste.
We will do any thing funny but dress up in a cheap mass produced Chicken suit!
Our Female Performer...
Desiree the One Night Stand
Hugely pregnant and looking for the ‘Bloke what done it’, Desiree is delightfully tarty but tasteful. Buffonned hair and far too much make up. She’ll tell anyone that will listen how she was left stranded with a lump... This is Gyll’s most popular performance to date. She has left audiences breathless and victims baffled. She loves to be heckled but watch out? Her comebacks will floor you.
Nina Naughty Nurse
She’ll tease, taunt and try your patients (yes we know that’s a pun).Take your victim and tell tall tales. She’ll try her best to get him into bed for a mutual blanket bath. And by the time she’s told all she’ll have you in stitches.
Battle Axe Betty the Matron
A similar theme to Nina but this one barks and bites. She’ll threaten you with an enema and scare the living bejeebas out of you. No nonsense Matron Betty will boss you around but have fun while doing it.
Tatty Arna the Bag Lady
Tatty Arna is very disgruntled that she has gone down in the world. A refugee from a vague Russian Royal family she now lives under the Auckland bridge with a gaggle of unwashed minders as her entourage. She will help herself to food, try to ‘borrow’ the cutlery. She’ll also demand attention when it’s time to embarrass your victim whilst doing all the grubby things that bag ladies do.
Milly the maid
Milly is there to clean. Not that she’s particularly good at it but she does try. Once she spies the victim who she just happens to recognize then it’s all on! Having worked in a French Brothel she recognizes them for all the wrong reasons. Once she spills the beans your victim will be toast.
Dolly Hard-On
If the person you’re trying to get is a Country & Western fan (or especially if they hate it) call on Dolly. With mammories that arrive two minutes before she does, she’ll bring down the house with a hoot n holler. She gives you a right raucous rendition of an old favourite that is all about the special guest.
Mrs Manda Tory
A fine upstanding conservative pillock of the community. After several attempts at being the chairwoman of the Country Women’s institute she’s decided to go free lance as a time and efficiency coordinator. She’ll have no nonsense or new fangled goings on. She’s a demon when it comes to maximizing efficiency and doing the right thing. She may not like to be seen having a good time but you sure will. She’ll have you labeled and categorized and place in her box in no time.
Delorez the Dominatrix
She’s big and bad and is looking for a little puppy sub to embarrass in public. After you’ve been collared she’ll harness you to a chair and tell everyone all your whimpy little adventures as well as make you do strange things with delicious props. Trussed and tied you’ll have no option but to listen and obey. Be warned though! You’re in for a spanking new experience! (Please note this is a more adult type of telegram and it is preferred that guests are over 18)
we will tailor your telegram package to suit your needs should you require any other performances or characters .
Call or text - 027 4339481
Ph 0274 339481
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Areas covered,
Auckland, North Auckland, South Auckland, East Auckland, West Auckland, North Shore, Manukau, Albany, Takapuna, Newmarket, Henderson, Parnell, Ponsonby, Pukekohe, Papakura, Beachlands, Howick, Rodney, Waitekere, Central Auckland , Franklin.
New Zealand wide, Including: Auckland, Wellington, Thames, Christchurch, Tauranga, Hamilton, Dunedin,Taupo, Rotorua, Palmerston north, New plymouth, Wanganui, Whanganui, Whangarei, Queenstown, Napier, Hastings, Gisborne, Nelson, North shore, Central Auckland, East Auckland, South Auckland, West Auckland, Nelson, Timaru, Queenstown, Invercargill.
New zealand Provinces: Waikato, Taranaki, Hawkes Bay, Horowhenua, Wairarapa, Canterbury, Otago, Southland, Westland, Manawatu, Bay of Plenty, Marlborough, Tasman, West coast.
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